“I get to start 21 with the most self-love I have ever felt, with the aptitude to be self-aware, with my man- a man with as much love and belief in my dreams as I do, with a remarkable support system- that I didn’t even expect to have, with the knowledge that my sister has my back no matter where I am, with many new & some old souls in my life that are like-minded, resilient and positive, AND above all WITH the confidence that 21 will be so fucking epic- no matter what it looks like… through the pain & the glory, there will be GROWTH and THAT my dear friends is the best gift I could ever hope for.
Thank you Universe. I have so much love in my heart on this day.”
See the thing is, the older you get the less materialistic things appeal to you- I mean this for most mature motherfuckers out there. You start wishing for good health, happiness, joy, love- essentially the classics. And I mean we aren’t THAT old, but still, some sort of perspective does sink in, and for me this year I have realized that most important things are: me reaching my goals and seeing my sister- and above everything setting an example, paving the legacy that I want for my life. Big things, but un-manifested things.
Last week this song started playing at my workplace “Stranger things” by Kygo ft. OneRepublic, and in some of the lines I could feel myself being understood, let me break it down for you.
“WE left a life that`s ordinary from the start, we looked for stranger things because that’s just who we are”
The more I have been listening to it the more I believe more and more in this concept of giving up: giving up the ordinary to achieve the extraordinary. YOU must go outside of your comfort zone to learn. This path can only be paved in a unique way, shaped to you as a person. Shaped to me. ‘Who I am’ is searching for ‘more’ constantly- the ‘more’ of life- the extraordinary, and I will not rest until I have reached it. Nothing is more important. I will walk away from anything because THE DREAM IS EVERYTHING. I`m not kidding, I did it once and will do it a hundred times over- learning this truly morphed me in such a permanent way that can never ever be undone, there is only moving forward.
21 begins with gratitude. I`ve made it this far. Damn. And I have so much further to go- true, but good lord do I have so much to be grateful for this year. 20 gave me the chance to have a successful and beautiful set up for 21, without the support of my kind-hearted support system in the beginning to mid 2017- without the faith of those people who cared for me when I felt like I was broken, without the love of the people who picked me up each time I was down, without the belief in ME from THEM and allowance to live my life to the absolute fullest I would not have spent the last 6 months of 20 reaching each day one step closer to the BEST Sara-Lynn, and honestly to me that’s the best gift. The fact that there were people there- still are- cheering for me regardless of where I find myself in the world. Nothing is more beautiful-more poetic than the gift of faith, confidence in yourself, the support of others in yourself and I mean I did it. I move an ocean from what I know as home, and I started new. I am turning 21 in full speed heading and working towards my dreams and goals because of what 20 gave me- WITH the pain might I add because without the pain there would be no chance of a happy and joyful 21.
I like to write down my goals when entering a new age, refocus on the basics like values, belief systems, ideal world vs. reality, and overall personal growth (spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally). This year, for the first time I am doing 100% what I want, no shame, no excuses, no second-guessing, no accommodating, I`m doing me- the most authentic version of me, and honestly I CAN NOT think of a better way to begin my 20s with the intention and respect for myself that I:
- Should always remember
- will always carry into the future
Remember that self-love is the key to everything, to happiness- your own happiness, and doing each action with the purpose of honoring myself in this form truthfully can only be a REALLY (fucking) good thing.
So here I am 21, ready to take YOU on. Appreciative for 20, but ready with open arms. Ready to learn. Ready to take on the unknown. Ready to GO.
SUPER SIDE NOTE:
I`m not sure if anyone else does this but I like to remember my life with music- so I will replay a song a thousand times during a time period in my life so it is embedded in my mind forever, and I can then recall that moment with the simple press of “play”. For me currently is the following playlist:
- Stranger things – by Kygo ft. OneRepublic
- Love$ick – by Mura Masa ft. A$ap Rocky
- Earth: The Oldest Computer – by Childish Gambino
- Make me like you – by Gwen Stefani
- Meant to Be – by Bebe Rexha ft. Florida Georgia
Music makes a lot possible. And I am tremendously grateful for that as well.